THE ART OF BED, BATH, AND BEYOND
One great thing about living in a big city like Los Angeles is being able to experience culture at such an intense level. This weekend, Terra Naomi and I were lucky enough to take a trip to Bed, Bath, and Beyond on Ventura, where we came upon the most wonderful collection of art I’ve ever witnessed. Terra took photos of many of the finest works. I thought I’d share these with all of you:
I think this piece is just wonderful. It’s entitled, ‘WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU, BED, BATH, AND BEYOND? AKA WHO IN THE WORLD BUYS THIS SHIT?’
This is one of the first pieces that caught my eye. It’s called, ‘LET’S SEE HOW UGLY WE CAN MAKE SOMETHING.’
I’m not usually into ‘message’ pieces, but this piece is different: ‘THIS BRIDGE IS POORLY PAINTED, BUT IF WE PUT SOME OTHER BULLSHIT AROUND IT MAYBE NO ONE WILL NOTICE.’
This piece is truly remarkable. It’s called ‘LOOKS LIKE SOMETHING I’D STARE AT IN MY DRUNK UNCLE’S GAME ROOM WHILE HE’S MOLESTING ME.’
I was honestly surprised by the title of this one, ‘FUCK YOU, EVE, YOU TALENTLESS BITCH.’ The title seems to give off a negative vibe when the painting is rather upbeat. But I think it’s that contrast that gives the piece some of its power.
Ah. Wow. This one slayed me. They called it ‘LET’S TAKE AN OLD MAGAZINE COVER THAT WASN’T THAT INTERESTING IN THE FIRST PLACE AND CALL IT ART. NEXT, I’M GOING TO SPREAD MY ASSHOLE ON A COPY MACHINE, COPY IT, AND CALL THAT ART TOO.’
This one is called, ‘CUNT WITH POOP COMING OUT OF IT.’
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The name of this is, ‘I’M ACTUALLY HAVING A HARD TIME MAKING FUN OF THIS ONE BECAUSE IT LOOKS VERY MUCH LIKE SOMETHING MY MOTHER MIGHT HAVE IN MY FAMILY’S LAKE HOME.’
This one is called, ‘TERRA TOOK A PHOTO OF HERSELF IN THE SIDE OF MY CAR AND THOUGHT IT LOOKED LIKE A PIECE OF BED, BATH, AND BEYOND ART. SHE’S WRONG. IT LOOKS BETTER.’
This one is provocatively entitled, ‘I TOOK SOME SHIT AND THREW IT DOWN ON A SNACK TRAY AND NOW I’M GOING TO SELL IT TO A MORON.’
I have to admit. This one didn’t affect me at first. And then, bam, all of a sudden, I was standing there, weeping. It’s called, ‘IMAGINE ME HOLDING YOU DOWN AND RAPING YOUR MOUTH. ARE YOU IMAGINING IT? OK, NOW TURN IT INTO A PAINTING.’
The artist of this took a humanitarian trip to Darfur, where he saw human beings committing incredible injustices upon their fellow men. In light of this, he created perhaps Bed, Bath, and Beyond’s most powerful work: ‘COLLECTION OF RED THINGAMAJIGS OFFENDING MY SENSIBILITIES.’
I feel so fortunate that I was able to experience these pieces, and was able to purchase a few of them for as low as $39.95. I’m looking forward to experiencing some other cultural institutions in the near future, like the Z Gallery and Successories. I’ll be sure to let you know about it here.
Go fuck yourselves,
James
