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My 50 Favorite Songs of the Decade


50. A Good Man Is Easy to Kill – Beulah


49. Lloyd, I’m Ready to Be Heartbroken – Camera Obscura


48. Poison Oak – Bright Eyes


47. The Way It Is – Nicole Atkins


46. I Was Meant for the Stage – The Decemberists


45. Fluorescent Adolescent – The Arctic Monkeys


44. Bandages – Hot Hot Heat

43. Wish It Would Rain – Roger Joseph Manning, Jr.

42. The Sea Has Spoken – Misophone


41. You Stood Me Up – Benji Hughes


40. Reconsider Me – Moneybrother

39. Nothing Wrong – The Wannadies

38. Cool to Be Kind – Assembly Now


37. Melanie – The Nines


36. Now That I Can See – Couple


35. Lisztomania – Phoenix


34. The Way It Was – Aceyalone (f. Bionik)


33. Wicked Little Town – Hedwig and the Angry Inch

32. Turn It Around – Steve Ward


31. Keep the Home Fires Burning – The Bluetones


30. Boylife in America – Cody Chestnutt


29. The New Kid – The Old 97’s


28. I Want to Be Buried in Your Backyard – Nightmare of You


27. Tired of Being an Object – The Ark


26. The Mercy Seat – Johnny Cash


25. The Seed – Cody Chesnutt


24. Morning Show – Metro Jets


23. Beauty Is the Beast – The Ark


22. Dog Days Are Over – Florence + The Machine

21. The Killer Comeback Line – The Second Band


20. The Waitress – Atmosphere


19. When We Swam – Thao and the Get Down Stay Down


18. See These Bones – Nada Surf

17. Down Like Me – Ken Stringfellow


16. Can’t Stand Me Now – The Libertines


15. The World Should Revolve Around Me – Little Jackie


14. Alright – The Lost Patrol


13. Rollerskate Skinny – Old 97’s

12. It’s Been Hurting All the Way with You Joanna – Moneybrother

11. Dear Scene, I Wish I Were Deaf – Nightmare of You


10. No Song – The Second Band


9. Gemini (Birthday Song) – Why?


8. Calling All Destroyers – Tsar


7. Morning After Pill – Louis Logic & JJ Brown


6. Backstabber – The Dresden Dolls


5. I taught Myself How to Grow Old – Ryan Adams


4. Teenagers – My Chemical Romance


3. Say It’s Possible – Terra Naomi


2. Wild Is the Wind – The Second Band


1. Tears Dry on Their Own – Amy Winehouse

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Jesus Did Something Very Bad

He made this kid exist:


I guess you think that’s funny, Jesus, making this freaky little kid and all, but it’s kind of tripping me out and making me sick to my stomach a little bit. But I suppose that was your point in creating him? Your ways really ARE mysterious, huh?

(Thanks to Tess for turning me on to this: Video courtesy of the fine, funny, depraved folks at EverythingIsTerrible.com.)

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My 50 Favorite Films of the Decade


50. Battle Royale


49. The Wrestler – Darren Aronofsky


48. Lagaan: Once Upon a Time in India – Ashutosh Gowariker


47. Punch-Drunk Love – Paul Anderson


46. Cache – Michael Haneke


45. Donnie Darko – Richard Kelly


44. Dancer in the Dark – Lars Von Triers


43. Cast Away – Robert Zemeckis


42. About Schmidt – Alexander Payne


41. Monsters, Inc. – Pete Docter and David Silverman


40. About a Boy – Chris Weitz and Paul Weitz


39. The Departed – Martin Scorsese


38. Bad Santa – Terry Zwigoff


37. Once – John Carney


36. Before Sunset – Richard Linklater


35. The Station Agent – Thomas McCarthy


34. Saw – James Wan


33. Superbad – Greg Mottola


32. No Country for Old Men – Ethan Coen and Joel Coen


31. Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl – Gore Verbinski


30. You Can Count on Me – Kenneth Lonergan


29. Cloverfield – Matt Reeves


28. In the Loop – Armando Iannucci


27. J.S.A. Joint Security Area – Chan-wook Park


26. Adaptation – Spike Jonze


25. Napoleon Dynamite – Jared Hess


24. In the Mood for Love – Wong Kar Wai


23. Sexy Beast – Jonathan Glazer


22. A History of Violence – David Cronenberg


21. Spirited Away – Hayao Miyazaki


20. The Bourne Ultimatum – Paul Greengrass


19. Gwoemul (The Host) – Joon-hu Bong


18. Far from Heaven – Todd Haynes


17. Hero – Zhang Yimou


16. 28 Days Later – Danny Boyle


15. Chopper – Andrew Dominik


14. Oldboy – Chan-wook Park


13. Pan’s Labyrinth – Guillermo del Toro


12. Toy Story 2 – John Lasseter, Ash Brannon, and Lee Unkrich


11. 2046 – Wong Kar Wai


10. Janghwa, Hongryeon (A Tale of Two Sisters) – Ji-woon Kim


9. Hedwig and the Angry Inch – John Cameron Mitchell


8. Y Tu Mama Tambien – Alfonson Cuaron


7. Kill Bill Volumes 1 & 2 – Quentin Tarantino


6. Cidade de Deus (City of God) – Fernando Meirelles and Katia Lund


5. Audition – Takashi Miike


4. Kung Fu Hustle – Stephen Chow


3. United 93 – Paul Greengrass


2. Together – Lukas Moodysson


1. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind – Michel Gondry

PS I have excluded my own films.

PPS This may all change tomorrow.


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The 16 Rules of Fight Club

So a few weeks ago, Rainn Wilson posted a new “First Rule of Fight Club” on Twitter. I thought this was funny, so I retweeted it, and started obsessively writing additional rules. From there, other folks added their own rules, including Pete Alton, @Brandon007, @EdouardBond, and @tollishtwit. Although this has been reposted in other places, I thought I’d finally post the original sixteen rules here.

1st Rule of Fight Club? Don’t talk about ‘potpourri’.

2nd Rule of Fight Club: Don’t put a cigarette in your penis and pretend like it’s smoking.

3rd Rule of Fight Club: Always know where Fight Club is held, so you don’t need to stop and ask for directions to Fight Club.

4th Rule of Fight Club: The safe word is “Bernadette Peters.”

5th Rule of Fight Club: Don’t put peanuts in any of the pot luck items. Sal is deathly allergic.

6th Rule of Fight Club: Turn off your cell phone.

7th Rule of Fight Club: No one wearing any Ed Hardy apparel will be allowed to enter Fight Club.

8th Rule of Fight Club: You have to admit, it’s still fucking hilarious when Philip does jazz hands in the middle of a fight.

9th Rule of Fight Club: No, the Lord’s Prayer at the end of Fight Club is not necessary, but please be respectful of others who pray during this time.

10th Rule of Fight Club: Just wearing a Ramones T-shirt doesn’t make you hip.

11th Rule of Fight Club: Anyone sending me a Facebook invitation to play Farmville will be immediately ejected from Fight Club.

12th Rule of Fight Club: Don’t flush the paper towels. We’ve had a lot of plumbing problems from idiots doing this.

13th Rule of Fight Club: No air saxophone in Fight Club.

14th Rule of Fight Club: Don’t do a “retarded voice” in Fight Club. It may be funny to you, but Kenny’s brother has Down syndrome and he’s, understandably, sensitive.

15th Rule of Fight Club: This is supposed to be fun! Smile, you guys!

16th Rule of Fight Club: IN FIGHT CLUB, THERE ARE NO RULES (besides the preceding 15 rules. Especially that retarded thing: seriously not cool.)

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Precious Is Fat: My Insightful Oscar Commentary

For those of you who missed my Twitter commentary on the Oscars yesterday, here it is:

Why is Alec Baldwin standing like a Neanderthal?

There was a 4th John Hughes kid, but Matthew Broderick killed him while drunk driving.

Fuck this Logorama bastard piece of shit for screwing up my Oscar pool.

Mrs. Garrett just won an Academy Award for documentary short.

God, this is boring. If I didn’t drive @Yarvo I think I’d be on my way home to jerk off to furry porn, or something else more interesting.

Precious is fat.

I think Up in the Air may be the best Pixar movie. I mean, it really looks realistic!

Mo’nique was good in Precious, but I liked her better in The Parkers.

‘An Education’ is my favorite movie in the Twilight saga.

Wait a second. I’m forgetting. Who are the nominees this year for Best Anal Scene?

I love that costume design chick. She absolutely did not give a shit that she just won an Oscar!

What better people to present the horror reel than the stars of Twilight? #fuckyousohardoscars

Why is this horror tribute sucking Tim Burton’s cock?

The best of horror!

(My favorite response, during the Horror Tribute:) RT @Ian_Pretorious @james_gunn I’m taking it you didn’t like the oscar salute to the horror section at Wal-Mart.

I can’t believe James Cameron had time to sound edit the Hurt Locker.

I think John Travolta just insinuated that the holocaust didn’t happen (Tarantino ‘rewrote history.’)

These people are all dead.

Every year they throw a live person into the dead people montage, to keep us awake. Karl Malden is alive & well, folks.

I want to do a montage of living people whose careers are dead.

I’m enjoying this salute to gay Hollywood dance sequence.

I like the part in The Cove when Ed Helms marries that stripper.

I love when Tyler Perry puts on that fat suit and plays Precious.

THE END

P.S. Although I was retweeted hundreds of times and I got a lot of new followers, I also got a lot of people sending me the Wikipedia page for Karl Malden to show me that he was really dead, and a few folks explaining to me that “Up” was the Pixar movie and “Up in the Air” was actually live action, which is why it looked so good. Um, okay. I also got a few people offended by my Tweets. Sorry. If you don’t like ‘em, click unfollow!

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The Masterful Stylings of Mark Gormley

Since, I don’t have anything else to post today, I thought I’d put up the greatest hits of one of my favorite musicians, Mark Gormley. First, is what I consider the greatest of all his tunes, “Gray Days.”

However, it’s the next two numbers, “Little Wings” and “Without You” that are by far his most popular:

Here’s an interview with the man himself:

One of the comments below this video: “When I play D and D I play as Mark Gormley.”

I really like what Tommy Robinetti adds to the proceedings.

Here’s a pretty good report from Attack of the Show, which gives us all a lot more information:

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